venerdì 1 agosto 2025

Nonnas - 2025

It was a nice film but I’m sorry to say that to me it was brought down by Vaughn’s expression, in the way that he had just one, the ‘impassive way’. I liked all the others though.
It’s based on a true story apparently, and this restaurant is still open, they say, so basically this movie is just a huge commercial…

It starts showing Joe as a kid, with his Italian mom and grandma cooking (although they have American coffee and not moka…)
Now Joe is an adult, and has to deal wiht the death of his mom. They don’t really talk about it, but I think she was the last one he had, other than friends. He was very close to her and took care of her, and now it hurts, of course.
His best friend Bruno and his wife Stella urge him to do something, go out and find a hobby, something, other staying at home mourning.
He makes a trip to Staten Island, remembering his time there with his mom, and meets Olivia again, a girl he knew in school, but that now has a wedding ring on her finger
Then he sees a sign, of a restaurant up for sale, and buys it. Bruno is not equally excited, because he can clearly see all the difficulties, and he’s right, he’s being realistic, but Joe has alreadybought it so Bruno helps him with all the renovations, and there’s a lot to do. Without telling Joe, Bruno sells his beloved car that belonged to his father when he was a kid. 
He does it to be able to help, to pay the men working on this renovations. 
For the food, Joe personally asks Roberta, who was his mother’s best friend, and also asks Gia, who was his mother’s hairdresser, but also a friend. Gia is really good with cassate and cannoli, generally desserts.
Olivia wants Antonella to join, and forces her a little, a friendly push, thinking it will be good for her, and indeed one of the nicest scenes is when Olivia comes back to get her at the end of her first day there, but before opening the door she looks through the window and she sees Antonella laughing, that’s touching.
Olivia said she’d do anything for Antonella and we soon learn why: Olivia lost her husband, he died, and Antonella was a great help for her, she didn’t leave her alone, she was a huge huge help. 
Now, what makes the difference between succeeding or failing? Talent, working hard, yes yes, all these things are important and necessary, but the key factor in this world is the same everywhere: Luck. And money and connections, but luch is first. The man doing the inspection fails the restaurant, and with no permit they can’t open, and the man says that it’ll take up to a year before he can make another inspection. it seems like the end, desperation leads Joe and Bruno to a bad fight. As a last resort, Joe asks for Olivia’s help, she’s becoming a lawyer or something, and she finds out that the man has a habit of failing his inspections so that people will pay him to have another one soon. To appease Olivia, the man comes back and gives Joe his permit, so now he can open. 
The first night there is a big storm, but the following nights are the same: nobody comes. Antonella is quite angry with a man at the market when she learns that he’s sabotaging the restaurant, in the way that he’s been telling people not to go there because for years it was a local man’s restaurant and they don’t like the idea of someone else, especially one not from Staten Island, taking his place.
The women talk and get to know each other, and they also urge Joe not to give up before he’s tried everything. So he personally shows up at a food critic’s office, it’s quite late and he finds all doors open for him and not one soul to stop him, how lucky.
This critic Durant won’t go to Enoteca Maria because he only goes to fancy restaurants. Joe brought the food to him though, and leaves it there after he’s said his piece, and Durant will try it and send a woman to review the place.
Joe has one last night, a party, to use all the food stored in the kitchen before closing the restaurant, not knowing about the critic of course. 
It’s a wonderful surprise when Bruno and Stella show him a paper with an excelent review, and of course after that he won’t close. 
The place is a huge success, so he can buy Bruno’s old car back for him. 
Olivia is now ready to move on and starts a relationship with Joe.
There’s  also Teresa, a retired nun from the Bronx who wanted a chance at another life, and she got it.
The end.
I liked how they didn’t say anything esplicitly about their relationship, but they showed Olivia’s hand without her wedding ring, the clear signal that she was now ready to move on.



Vince Vaughn as Joe
Linda Cardellini as Olivia
Lorraine Bracco as Roberta
Susan Sarandon as Gia
Talia Shire as Teresa
Brenda Vaccaro as Antonella
Joe Manganiello as Bruno
Drea de Matteo as Stella

giovedì 31 luglio 2025

Transformers: The Last Knight - 2017



In the Dark Ages, Merlin was a liar, not a true wizard, but he knew the Autobots and asked their help to help King Arthur and was given a dragon-bot.
1600 years later, after the fourth movie: Optimus left to find his makers. Megatron vanished too. Without them, it’s humans vs bots, now declared ‘illegal on Earth’. They’re free in Cuba only.
Good for Cuba.
Cade lives in hiding with Bee and other autobots ; Optimus finds the Maker, and her touch is like Mind Control; she orders him to bring her back her staff that was stolen from her, she says (the one that was given to Merlin).
Cade is given an object by a dying bot, which gets later attached to his arm, and a c3po-like bot, Cogman, comes to tell him that he’s been chosen and takes him to England.
Count Burton tells him that Bumblebee fought the Nazis under another name. That 12 bots fought with King Arthur, 12 bots and 12 men. “Legend held that one last night would someday be chosen and the struggle to save the world would begin”.
Cade is that last knight. Viviane is the last descendant from Merlin and the only one who can get the staff. 
Simmons finds a legendary book and the solution to a big question, about where these alien things appear and Stonehenge at its center.
Cade and Vivian have their mission: they use a submarine to find a lost ship.
Cybertron the planet is coming here, they see what looks like two moons, and quite soon will come to Earth causing million of deaths.
They find Merlin’s tomb and what looks like a stick, but when she touches it it becomes the staff.
Lennox and other men come for it, but then ‘Optimus’ is there adn they’re forced to give it to him, although it’s clear he’s not himself. He’s Nemesis now.
He fights Bee but then suddenly BumbleBee finds his voice, his own real voice, to remind him of who he is and of their friendship or something, and Prime is Optimus again. He stops.
Megatron comes to take the staff, saying that Optimu failed to save Cybertron and kill Unicron (Earth) and flies away with the staff.
The 12 (I think) bot-knights come to attack Optimus, and Optimus is about to get killed when Cade’s metal thing becomes a sword that can stop him, and now all the bots there hail him as the last knight.
The Guardian Knights call the Maker: Quintessa the Great Deceiver.
Burton dies against Megatron, at the Stonehenge portal.
It seems like in a momeny they stopped Megatron.
Then the plan is to stop Quintessa, so Viviane must take the staff back.
There’s a big fight, the little blue bot Squeaks helps, Optimus and Bee defeat Quintessa and Megatron, Viviane takes the staff and Optimus saves them. 
It’s the end, time for Optimus Prime’s speech about repairing both our worlds, and there’s more to Earth than it seems, and it’s time for Autobots to go back home… whatever that means… and in the last scene there’s a strange woman in the desert saying that she knows how to kill Unicron… again, whatever that means, lots of ways to kill the Earth, since they live so long they could just wait until humans do the work…

Mark Wahlberg as Cade Yeager
Anthony Hopkiins as Sir Edmond Burton
Josh Duhamel as Colonel William Lennox
Laura Haddock as Vivian Wembly
Stanley Tucci as Merlin
John Turturro as Agent Simmons

P.s. well, the sword scene was really cool, heroic, such a pity he sort of had only that one scene to show he was The Last Knight of the Legend… other than that, he was just another brave fighter like there’s one in all transformers movies.
The soldiers scenes back and forth felt a bit useless, I mean I understand they couldn’t just… do nothing, they had to show the soldiers fighting as well,but still, many long scenes pretty useless…

It’s nice that they didn’t just forget that Cade had a daughter, she was just away for her safety, and he couldn’t talk to her to avoid someone tracking her or him, but he could call her and hear her voice telling him she was fine and safe.

Cogman.. yes I did like him a lot, he was great in every scene, maybe the best thing in the movie, maybe, for sure one of the best.

ITA Transformers L’ultimo Cavaliere 




Fast X - 2023

Well, this is ok, there’s the whole lot of characters, which is nice, I like it when they’re all together, only here they’re present in the story, yes, but not really together, not really doing much, it is still mostly Dom vs Dante… bu still, I appreciate that they’re all here. Problem is, this one is a lot of noise, like a lot, but not much heart, so I’m waiting for the next movie to put it all back together.
This is not one I’d watch again, but if they do it the right way, the next one might be.

Ten years ago in Rio De Janeiro, Dom and Brian stole a whole safe, and while escaping Dom causes the death of a man, drug boss Hernan Reyes, and injures his psycho son Dante. Now, the son wants to make him suffer. He steals men and technology from Cipher, turning her men against her blackmailing them with their families.
She sort of wins against them all but is badly injured; she gets to Dom’s house to tell him all. 
Han has gone to Rome with Tej, Roman and Ramsey for a mission but it’s not a real one, it’s a trap. Dom and Letty go there to help, and avoid a big bomb destroying the whole city by pushing it into the river Tevere… (how could that be enough… wel, it’s not like sense means a lot in these movies, so let’s ignore it). Now the six of them are called terrorists, with Dom as their leader. 
Hobbs, Mr Nobody, and all those at thet Agency who were their friends are not in charge anymore, and this new guy Aimes believes them to be criminals; Mr Nobody’s daughter Tess doesn’t. 
I Carabinieri got Letty so now the Agency has her. 
Aimes goes after Mia and Little Brian (his life consists in his father teaching him how to drive and win… he’s just a little child…ok…). Queenie warned Dom so he called his brother Jacob to help, then Mia goes to Brian while the kid goes with Jacob to meet Dom. 
Tess meets with Dom, she stole God’s Eye from the Agency and tracked him; she tells him about Dante, but he wants Letty out first. Tess manages to free her… sort of. Gives her a way to escape…
Dom goes to Rio, meets Dante at those street races, and they race. It’s four cars, not just them, and Dante put bombs in their cars. Dom can’t save both of the others, he manages to save the girl, but his friend Diogo dies. She turns out to be Elena’s sister. 
In London, the four friends have nothing so Han knocks at Shaw’s door; they fight a bit then stand together against all the men coming to kill them.
Aimes gets Dom.
Letty meets Cipher and they get out together, sort of. They’re in Antarctica. 
All those who helped Dom are targets, so even Queenie, Shaw’s mom. 
Dante attacks Aimes and all his men so now he listens to Dom…
Dante got sis though, but Tess helps him so it should be Dante vs Dom, but he’s got snipers on a helicopter. Tess is shot but she’ll live.
Dante got God’s Eye so now he can track where little Brian is. 
Now Aimes says he wants to help, to make amends…
Jacob is really good but eventually Dante takes little B so he blows himself up to stop many cars and help Dom save his son.
The guys arrive on a plane but Dante shoots it down.
Little B jumps from one car to the other so he’s with Dom now.
We see that Aimes is actually with Dante, has been for ten years.

Only two scenes before the end: Dom is about to die with little B, drowned I think, while in Antarctica a girl comes to help Cipher, wiht a submarine emerging from the ice.
The end.
Mid-credits we see that it was Hobbs who shot and definitely killed Reyes, so Dante wants him to suffer too.
The end for real this time… but not really because the story isn’t finished…

We don’t know the fate of anyone, and Dante is still very much alive and free, and so is Aimes.

Wait…
Wikipedia says that the girl coming to get Cipher is Gisele… I didn’t recognize her if it’s the same WW actress, but it would certainly be nice if it’s her… since I don’t believe for one moment that th guys are all dead, it would be a very sh**ty way to end the saga, wouldn’t it?
I will certainly wait for the next movie, hoping to see Han and Gisele reunited… and also to learn how the hell can she be alive, and without a word to anyone… did she lose her memory like Letty did?

Vin Diesel as Dominic
Michelle Rodriguez as Letty
Jason Statham as Shaw
Jordana Brewster as Mia
Tyrese Gibson as Roman
Chris ‘Ludacris’ Bridges as Tej
Nathalie Emmanuel as Ramsey
Charlize Theron as Cipher
John Cena as Jacob
Sung Kang as Han
Helen Mirren as Queenie
Brie Larson as Tess
Jason Momoa as Dante
Alan Ritchson as Aimes

Scott Eastwood as Little Nobody
Where was Little Nobody in this film? I didn’t see him… I remember him from previous Fast movies but really, where was he in this one?

ITA Fast & Furious X

mercoledì 30 luglio 2025

Birds of prey and the fantabulous emancipation of one Harley Quinn - 2019

Ok to have watched it once, not really one I want to watch again, and I’m not even sure why. She was fun, but there were too many things, it was a bit of a mess. 
Absurdly, one of the scenes I liked more was when Zsazs spoke with Roman like he wanted to protect him… but the film doesn’t really show why, he simply appeared to be one of the thugs, one of many on Roman’s payroll, until that scene lets you think they have a special bond. But I didn’t get anywhere that they were anything at all, not even his confidante, not even his most trusted thug… 
Also, the Montoya character was a bit boring in a movie like this, and even Black Canary and the Huntress were not given the right atmosphere… I don’t know how to say it, but in a Batman movie he doesn’t just enter a room, no hero just enters a room, they have a hero entrance, even if they just appear and do nothing, the camera and the lights and the music, everything works to give you a du-dun effect, to make you go WOW the hero just arrived… and I know that these girls were not heroes like Batman, we didn’t know any of them, but they should have had something, just something to make their entrance cool and to tell us that they’re going to be heroes or at least important on the heroes side…
Yeah, I think that’s what was missing here.

It starts with a brokenhearted Harley, she broke up with the Joker for good. Before, when they were together, she sort of had immunity because everyone was scared of him, but then when the old “Ace Chemicals” goes up in flames because of her, everybody learns the truth, and now they all want her head. 
Roman is the big baddie, Dinah Lance is the singer in his club, but she becomes his driver after he sees her fighting. That’s because a drunk out of her mind Harley was about to get carried inside a van by two guys, so Dinah saved her.
Cassandra is a young thief, with a history of really bad foster parents, and she lives in the same building as Lance. She’s really good at pickpocketing, and she takes a small box with a diamond inside from Czas’ pocket.
The Huntress is the only survivor of the Petrinelli or Bertinelli family, a name like that, and she hunted and killed all those who had a part in her family’ s deaths. Czas is the last one now, the fifth. 
Montoya is a cop but she has really bad people-skills; she’s really good at investigating but she has no friends and nobody likes her. Her boss takes all the credit for her work, that’s actually how he became her boss, and then he suspends her because she keeps breaking the rules to follow her leads. 
She even acts surprised but truthfully she has a bad attitude, especially with her ex. Montoya even acts like the wounded party when her ex warns her boss of what she did (which is why she got suspended) but really, she keeps using her ex without ever asking beforehand, and never apologising afterwards. She does what she wants because she thinks she’s in the right, working for the greater good, so rules should not count for her…

Csazs is Roman’s man, they’re very close, Zsazs behaves like Roman is his love to protect and make happy. 

Everyone is hunting Harley, even Montoya who makes her drop her beloved breakfast egg sandwich. 
Harley adopts a hyena that she calls Bruce like Bruce Wayne, and when the guy wants to be paid in nature, she has the hyena eat him.
When Roman catches her, she offers to find the diamond for him if he lets her live, and to this end she breaks into the police station because she knows Cass has been arrested. She takes Cass away, to her home.
Harley rather likes Cass and they talk a lot at her place. She lives above Doc’s diner, or whatever, and talks about him like he’s the only one who cares about her for real, and that’s why she’s hurt when he sells her out. That’s how the baddies find her, because they offered him lots and lots of money to tell them where she was, so he did and now he leaves.
Now Harley decides she’ll give Cass to Roman in exchange for him stopping everyone else from hunting her, for them to leave her alone.
Montoya approaches Lance because her mother was an informant - and she died because of it.
Lance starts helping her when Cass enters the picture, because she wants to help the girl. So now she warns her of an impending meeting/trap between Roman and Harley. All Roman wants is the diamond, he cares nothing about their lives.
There’s some kind of abandoned amusement park, Lance and Zsasz go there and he sees one of her message and phones Roman to tell him that she is the spy. Roman wants to go in person, wants to make her pay, and he wears his black mask… just because he likes it, I guess, it doesn’t seem to have any power at all. 
Harley meets with Montoya, Lance and Helena, who kills Zsaszs and she’s like ‘my job is doen, I’m sorry’ but Montoya stops her to tell her that it’s not done, that Roman gave the orders, or the money, whatever, to kill her family. 
Roman and a lot of men are here for them, so Harley suggests they work together to get out alive. They fight all the men who came inside, but outside there’s to many of them. Roman gets Cass and drives away, and Lance has to use her superpower: her supersonic voice, to knock everyone out, herself included (exhaustion maybe). Harley and Helena go after Roman and Cass, take out everyone else, then Cass tells her that she took her ring - meaning a hand granade that she activated, so Harley kicks him off the bridge and he goes up in pieces. 
Now victorious, the three women get the diamond which held the secret codes of Helena’s family’s money, and they fight crime together. Harley is by herself, and with Cass, and they go away together. With Bruce, still alive.

At the end, she says “they call themselves the Birds of Prey, I call them dorky little do-gooders”, and also “I made the kid my apprentice. Call me a softy. I dare ya”.

P.s. when they were fighting, Lance had her hair all over her face, like it would happen if it were real, so Harley gave her a hair tie for it. Not sure why it’s relevant but it was nice.

Margot Robbie as Harley Quinn
Rosie Perez as Renee Montoya
Mary Elizabeth Winstead as Helena Bertinelli
Jurnee Smollett-Bell as Dinah Lance/Black Canary
Ewan McGregor as Roman Sionis
Ella Jay Basco as Cassandra Cain
Chris Messina as Victor Zsazs
Ali Wong as Montoya’s ex girlfriend (Ellen, I think)

ITA Birds of Prey e la fantasmagorica rinascita di Harley Quinn

Scream - 1996

 I quite liked the beginning the first time I saw it, it was a nice switch and it was a little scary for a while, but the thrill didn’t last long.
The rest of the movie isn’t really scary at all, honestly, and it won’t be in the next movies either. I mean, things like seeing the mask reflected in a market while they’re shopping, or whatever things like this, they’re such silly things, not really scary at all. 
I liked the scene of the principal’s murder, because he was scaring himself, it was funny, and then he gets murdered, not funny, and it was a cool scene.


Details:
The girl is home alone when there’s a phone call, and twice she thinks that the guy called the wrong number, but he calls again while she’s making popcorn and about to watch a scary movie… then he asks her name because “I wanna know who I’m looking at”. She gets reasonably worried.
Twice she hangs up and he calls her again, and now he becomes threatening and she locks the house (really though,why wasn’t it locked before, especially knowing she’s home alone all night? It’s not like it’s so hard to do, it’s just a click, after all…)
She mentions her boyfriend, he shows her Steve is tied up in her garden. She answers trivia about scary movies, one wrong answer and Steve is dead. “What door am I at?” Is the third and last question… she runs, is caught and stabbed. Casey is dead and left hanging outside for her mom to find her. 
She was 17, Steve was 18.
Sidney’s been with her boyfriend Billy for two years, but they never had sex. Since her dad’s away, she goes to stay at Tatum’s. Sid gets a call and then is attacked but escapes, then Billy appears. He has a cell and Linus found a mask, so she runs away from him and he’s arrested.

A year ago her mom was raped and killed. Since it was proven that a certain Cotton had sex with her mother, sid accused him of it all, but Gale is sure she got the wrong man arrested.
There are many kids ‘joking’ by wearing a Ghostface costume…
Next one killed is the principal, the town closes early for curfew.
Linus/Dewey kisses Gale. 
The kids have a party at Stu Baker’s house. Tatum is killed and nobody notices. 
Sid and Billy have sex and then Ghostface stabs Billy. 
The police thinks it might be Sid’s mother. Cameraman Kenny is stabbed next while he tries to kill Sid, Linus is stabbed too. 
Billy is alive and Sid gives him her gun - not sure where she got it.
Billy shoots Randy then Sid sees that Billy and Stu are doing it together, Billy even framed Cotton.
Stu doesn’t really have a motive, butfor Billy, we’ree told that he found out that Sid’s mother had an affair with his father,and that’s why his mother left. 
Sid’s father is there, prisoner, all tied up. They want to frame him.
Gale appears to take the gun from him, but it’s got the safety on - they thought she had died… really?when? Why?
Gale and Linus are on the ground, Sid’s hiding, then she attacks Billy with an umbrella and Stu with a tv on his face. Billy is still alive, Gale shoots him. 
Randy, Sid’s dad and Linus are all alive.

By Wes Craven
Neve Campbell is Sidney
Skeet Ulrich is Billy
Courtney Cox is Gale Weathers
Drew Barrymore is Casey
Rose McGowan is Tatum
David Arquette is Deputy Dewey
Matthew Lillard is Stuart
Jamie kennedy is Randy

And Henry Winkler as the principal, although not in the ending credits.






Scream 2 - 1997

 Well, I’m rather indifferent here, not really good but not really bad either… it’s nothing I’d really want to watch again, though.
The part with Cotton were not bad, I liked his inclusion in the end, I liked that.
Details:
They made a movie called Stab. Masks as souvenirs for everyone in the theatre… “based on the book The Woodsboro Murders by Gale Weathers”. The audience is laughing and cheering, only one girl mentioning that it’s not just a movie but people got killed for real. 
A guy, Phil, spies on what another is saying in the booth next to him and is killed, then Ghostface wears his jacket and goes to sit next to Phil’s girlfriend Maureen. He stabs her right there while everyone watches the movie, and they all seem crazy, it takes a while for them to realize something’s wrong.
Sidney gets lots of phone calls from stupid people who think it’s funny to play Ghostface… that’s so sick.
Sid is with Derek now: “nice guy, pre-med, no apparent psychotic tendencies”
Gale put just-released Cotton in front of Sidney without warning her beforehand, so Sid hits her again.
Linus/Dewey is really offended because she wrote him as inexperienced and goofy.
There’s a party, Cici is home to be the “sober sister”, she goes out when a phone call scares her, she tries to call security but is killed anyway. She stayed in the house after all. 
Ghostface attacks Sid again and injures Derek. Gale does a better investigative work than the police, explaining how someone is trying to replicate the Woodsboro murders. Reporter Debbie plays much the Gale role while she’s developing a conscience because of Dewey.
Tori Spelling played Sid’s part in the movie like she thought in the first movie :lol:
Sid plays Cassandra in a Greek play at college, but it’s too much to expect it of her. Also, Sid is half afraid for Derek’s safety and half afraid of him, given her past.
While Randy’s on the phone with Ghostface Dewey and Gale run to find him, knowing that he can see them, but Randy gets killed anyway, of course.
Cotton is after Sid to do tv shows with him, to get popularity.
Joel the cameraman leaves, good for him.
There’s a lot of Gale/Linus flirting and kissing, then Linus goes after Ghostface who tries to kill Gale instead, but then he stabs Linus under her eyes.
Sid’s being taken away, under protection, but the cops are killed by Ghostface. Ghostface is knocked out too, and Sid and Halley have to move in front of him to get out of the car… then Sid leaves her alone to go back and see who it is under the mask, and Ghostface kills Halley.
Cotton finds Linus and Gale sees him with his hands all bloody and thinks it’s him. Sid runs and finds a tied-up Derek - tied by the brotherhood, and Mickey reveals himself. He wants to be found and known, to be famous. Mickey’s words have Sid doubt Derek, and then he shoots him. 
Mickey’s partner is Debbie, alas Mrs Loomis. Debbie shoots Mickey dead, and Gale gets injured. 
Debbie just wants revenge, because Sid killed Billy and she wants to avenge him. They are on the school theatre stage, and Sid activates all special effects to knock her out, but i’s not enough. Debbie still fights.
Cotton arrives to see them fighting and after Sid agrees to make that interview with him, Cotton shoots Debbie.
Gale joins them and they shoot Mickey who got up, because they always come back.
Sid tells the reporters to talk to Cotton that he’s the hero, so he’ll get what he wants: popularity and money.
Linus is alive of course. 

By Wes Craven
Neve Campbell as Sid
Courtney Cox as Gale 
Sarah Michelle Gellar as Cici
Jerry O’Connell as Derek
Jada Pinkett as Maureen
Omar Epps as Phil
Heather Graham as ‘Stab’ Casey
Elise Neil as Hallie
Liev Schreiber as Cotton
Josh Jackson as Film class guy n.1
Timothy Olyphant as Mickey
Laurie Metcalf as Debbie
Portia DeRossi as Sorority sister Murphy
David Arquette as Dewey
Luke Wilson as ‘Stab’ Billy












martedì 22 luglio 2025

Transformers: Dark of the Moon - 2011

 

During the battle on their planet, a ship left, a last hope, but it vanished… it crashed on the moon, so the Us sent people there. They entered the ship, saw a metal face but they thought it was all dead. 
Sam is now with Carly, they say that he broke up with his ex… actually the little bots say that Mikaela dumped him… :/ this is… :/
The President paid for his college and gave him a medal, and there he met Carly. (So basically he met her shortly after the end of the last movie, so I’m going to make sense of this and imagine that Mikaela rightly left him because he was drooling over Carly, and that all her suspicions turned out to be right when he started dating her right away… I don’t like Sam…)
He’s in Washington, with no job and no Bumblebee. Optimus and his bots still fight with humans, with Lennox and his men. They go to Chernobyl, fight Shockwave, a sort of worm-bot, and find “an engine part from a long lost autobot ship”
Sam wants a job of a certain level, no mailroom or stuff like that, but in the end he accepts because he can’t find any better. He got this job because Carly’s boss made a phone call, which upsets him because he’s so jealou and feels quite down and failing.
Optimus goes to the ship crash on the moon to retrieve Sentinel Prime, the pilot. Megatron knows about the ship and its cargo, they manipulated the humans into finding it. Jerry Wang warns Sam about something to do with the moon and then he’s killed by a bot. The entire office is attacked by a copy-machine-bot trying to get Sam who then goes to the military base to see Lennox and Optimus. He meets Bumblebee again, and is quite upset that he never showed up to see him before. 
Optimus uses the Matrix to revive Sentinel, who speaks of a big thing that could be terrible if the Decepticons got their hands on it. Some sort of space-bridge, teleport, stuff like that. The woman who is now in command sends Sam home calling him just a messenger. 
Simmons is now famous, he talked publicly about the whole thing, he wrote a book about it all. Sam calls him to tell him all about the moon. Sam’s boss bruce gives him information to see some bots (he plays a bit with Bee).
Carly doesn’t want him to fight, she already lost a brother, but he wants to go on so she leaves.
Sam talks to some Russians who sent cameras six years before America sent people, so now Sam knows the plan. The Decepticons got almost all the Pillars, what they need is Sentinel, the only one who can make it work. Sam warns the military, but it turns out that in order for their species to survive, Sentinel chose an alliance with the Decepticons, so now he joins them.
He activates the machine an lots of bots arrive and it’s a huge mess. Sam warns his parents to go away, far away. Mom tells him that after a fight, Ron always found her, so he goes to get Carly who is at her boss Dylan’s party. Dylan’s father worked with the Decepticons since the moon landing, and now Dylan does.
He threatens Carly’s life, and puts a bot-bracelet on Sam so that he’ll have to obey and find out Optimus plans. The Decepticons demand that the humans send away the Autobots. The government agrees.
Because of the bot-bracelet, Sam asks Optimus for his plans (no human will ever know) but the Autobot say they have no plans to come back. The Autobots launch away, and their rocket/ship/whatever gets destroyed. Sam watches, and then the bot-bracelet leaves him (rather absurd, but essential to the plot or he wouldn’t be able to do anything…)
Sam wants to go get Carly, and Epps goes with him. Dylan tells Carly that the plan is to move their planet here and use humans as slaves to do all the work. Lots of people are killed already, but Dylan only cares about surviving. Of course Optimus and the others are back, to fight the Decepticons. They were not on that ship.
Sam rescues Carly. Sam, Carly and Epps inform the military of what’s going on. Then they go themselves to stop Sentinel, with some gadgets provided by a Q-bot, that is also called Q or at least something that sounds like that.
Luckily, in movies, glass doesn’t hurt at all, they roll in pieces of broken glass and don’t feel it one bit.
Q is killed by the Decepticons, and it’s Bee’s turn, and Sam’s watching, but bots intervene to save him and again it’s a big fight. Finally the soldiers have a plan - shoot the eyes and bombs on the legs.
The transport of Cybertron has started, but they finally stop it with the arrival of Optimus. Dylan reactivates the pillars; Carly provokes Megatron saying Sentinel will be the new leader, not him, so Megatron fights Sentinel right before he kills Optimus (it’s a good thing, but still idiotic)
Optmus finally beheads Megatron and shoots Sentinel.
Fight over, Sam and Carly hug and kiss, say I love you… all the usual, just like the previous film, only now he wants to say it, maybe now he thinks it, who knows…
The end.
Simmons also kisses the woman in command, Charlotte, and she wants him arrested for this…
Once again it all ends quickly after a looooong run/fight

Shia LaBeouf as Sam Witwicky
Rosie Huntington-Whiteley as Carly
Josh Duhamel as Lennox
John Turturro as Simmons
Tyrese Gibson as Epps
Patrick Dempsey as Dylan
John Malkovich as Bruce Brazos
Frances McDormand as Mearing (Charlotte?)
Kevin Dunn as Ron Witwicky
Julie White as Judy Witwicky
Alan Tudyk as Dutch
Ken Yeong as Jerry Wang
Buzz Aldrin as himself

Peter Cullen was the voice of Optimus, and Hugo Weaving of Megatron.

Let me focus for a moment on the fact that Leonard Nimoy was the voice of Sentinel, the one who said “you simply fail to understand that the needs of the many outweigh the needs of the few”…


ITA Transformers 3 / Transformers il buio della luna
In Italy: 
Sam is Davide Perino, Carly is Miriam Catania, Optimus is of course Alessandro Rossi, Bruce is Mario Cordova, Ron is Massimo Corvo, and…. Ironhide is Roberto Pedicini!!!!!!



Pearl - 2022

 It is rather peculiar, and it’s also a bit of a psychological drama, as many horror movies can be when they want to, because the monsters can often be people with something wrong in their brain, but sstill, I wouldn’t watch this again. I’m not a fan of horror movies, I must say, but I don’t think this character was really well depicted. It’s not scary, for one; also, it seems they played on her looking like a naive girl to maximize the shock of her murders, but instead she just looks a bit off. I thought for a while that she was a young naive girl, and then it turns out she’s already married… she wants to appear a girl with dreams but with a mother thata wants to break her wings, but actually she’s just a selfish prat with sadistic tendencies.

Well, details now: 

It starts with a beautiful, idillic farm in 1918, with Pearl waking up and dreaming of being a dancer, but her German mom is very tired, very worried and very strict, and needs help, and her dad’s infirmed, almost comatose. Her husband Howard is oversea, at war. She dreams of leaving, of dancing, of becoming a star. 
Right at the start, she feeds the animals in her farm and then she kills a goose to feed her crocodile. 
Howard’s sister Mitsi tells her that there will be an audition for dancers in town; Pearl thinks she’ll be able to do what she wants after her parents’ deaths, “if only they would just die”. 
Because of her desire to dance and go to the audition, she has a huge, violent fight with her mother, they yell at each other and then mom gets too close to the fire and goes up in flames. Pearl puts it down with water and then… she locks her in the cellar. 
Pearl goes back to the projectionist she met in town, they have sex and then she takes him home, but he gets nervous because of her weird attitude, like ignoring the persistent thud and lying about having a dog… so he tries to leave and she gets mad, yells at him and when he starts to drive away she kills him and pushes him and his car in the river.
She suffocates her father and then leaves for the audition with a pretty red dress. The audition doesn’t go well, they want something different, and she loses it when they tell her no she yells and cries, and thinks of her mom’s words, how she knew she’d fail. 
Mitsi walks her home, trying to comfort her, and so she tells her “try to tell me what you’d like to tell Howard”, I guess she was expecting a totally different speech. Pearl lets it all out, from how she hates him for leaving her here to all the rest: she attracted his attention because she wanted his perfect family and hoped he’d take her away, but he liked the life in the farm. Then he went to war. She knows she did bad things, she started with small animals, killing them made her feel good, and then there were her mom who meant well and her friend, and her dad who didn’t deserve it… 
Mitsi is scared now, obviously, and tries to leave. Pearl knows from what the judges said that they’d choose Mitsi (more American, more blond…)
Mitsi leaves, but Pearl goes after her and kills her. She chops her body up and feeds it to the crocodile. 
Her dream’s over now. 
At home, she hugs her dead mother, then sets the table with rotten food and sits both dead parents around it. 
This  is what Howard sees when he gets home. She smiles at him and keeps forcing the smile through the ending credits while she cries.

Mia Goth as Pearl
David Corensweet as the projectionist
Emma Jenkins-Purro as Mitsi





Transformers - Revenge of the fallen - 2009

 Optimus’ voice says our worlds met already many years ago, when primitive although violent humans could very little against big bots. He also says: “for the last two years, an advance team of new autobots has taken refuge here under my command. Together, we form an alliance with the humans, a secret but brave squad of soldiers. A classified strike team called Nest. We hunt for what remains of our Decepticon foes hiding in different countries around the globe”. In Shanghai, one decepticon they stop says: “this is not your planet to rule! The Fallen shall rise again”.  “Not today” is what Optimus replies… maybe a little too hastily. 
We see that Sam is leaving home to go to college, and he’s still with Mikaela. Moving his stuff, something falls and “I think a sliver of the Cube got stuck on my shirt” and it gets free and turns many litte things in the house in violent bots. Luckily Bumblebee frees them from the nasty kitchen tools.
Bee’s sad though because in first year Sam is not allowed a car so he can’t take him along. 
She now has the cube piece in her bag.
((The advance team may include a race car, an old ice cream truck, autobot twins: two city cars? And three motorbikes? And two big trucks? Something like this))

Sam’s roommate is rather big on technology and posting news and uncovering the alien robots; Sam’s mom buys some cookies with marijuana and runs around the campus telling embarrassing things to anyone about Sam.
The cube piece protected by the military gets stolen by bad bots.
Sam misses his first videochat with his girl, and Bumblebee shows up to take him to Optimus Prime who asks for his help. Sam says no. A litte bot uses the piece to revive Megatron from the bottom of the ocean, or wherever he was. He has a boss too now, it seems, who has a grudge against all Primes. Optimus is the last one. The boss, or the Fallen, also wants Sam because apparently Sam absorbed the Cube powers or something, which explains why he sees strangely and absorbs a book in seconds and has a small mental breakdown.
He warns Mikaela not to touch the slice she has; she stops a small bot who wanted it and leaves to reach Sam.
A bot-girl (how is this possible?) attacks Sam ; Mikaela got there in time to see her kiss him before the attack. Big shooting in the library. Of course the bad bots want to kill but Bumblebee and Optimus save him. Optimus fights while Sam hides like Frodo. But then Optimus loses and tells him to run. The bad bots show themselves around the world, and threaten to destroy the world unless they surrender Sam to them. Sam and co. ask for Simmons help and they find a very old bot who was once a Decepticon but changed side, and so does the little bot Mikaela captured. This Jetfre opens a space bridge to get them instantly to Egypt. So: bots originally searched the worlds for some thing that is essential to them (otherwise they rot) but the seven original Primes, as a rule, never destroyed a planet if there was life. One bot wanted to destroy humans: the Fallen. With the Matrix of Leadership he could activate a machine to do that. A big battle for the Matrix, until the Primes used their bodies to seal the matrix in a sort of tomb. Only a Prime can defeat the Fallen, so Sam wants to find this energy to revive Optimus. Simmons calls Lennox to bring Optimus there; Sam finds the tomb but the matrix turn into dust. Sam still belileves it will work so he picks up the dust. There’s a battle, Sam and Mikaela trying to survive and reach Optimus, Leo and Simmons trying to survive with the bot twins.
Sam’s parents were brought by the Decepticons as a trap, Bumblebee saves all their lives. Sam gives both parents to Bumblebee to get them to safety. It’s all a big mess for a long while. Mikaela won’t leave him. Simmons tries to stop a big bot from getting to the machine under a pyramid. Finally Jetfire comes too, to help, but he’s too old for this. Sam almost dies in a bombing. While sort of dead/half dead, he sees the Primes telling him that the matrix must be earned, and this was always his destiny. Now the matrix is not dust anymore but a solid thing that he uses, stabs it in Optimus who is revived. The bad bots get the matrix to activate the machine. Jetfire offers his life and his parts to Optimus to become strong again.  
The machine will destroy the sun, but the good bots attack, it’s Optimus versus the Fallen.
In a moment it’s over, Optimus wins, our couple kiss, and i’s over, going back home. Just ilke that. Before you know it it’s all over. Rather disappointing, that. Sam goes back to college.

Shia LaBeouf as Sam Witwicky
Megan Fox as Mikaela Banes
Josh Duhamel as Major Lennox
Tyrese Gibson as “Usaf master sergeant Epps”
John Turturro as Simmons
Kevin Dunn as Ron Witwicky
Julie White as Judy Witwicky
It reads here that Optimus Prime’s voice was Peter Cullen, Megatron aws Hugo Weaving, the Fallen was Tony Todd
Well, In Italy Optimus is Alessandro Rossi, no better than that for a strong, good leader. 
Sam-Davide Perino, Simmons-Angelo Maggi, Mikaela-Alessia Amendola, Ron-Massimo Corvo, Judy-Franca D’Amato, Optimus-Alessandro Rossi





ITA Transformers la vendetta del caduto

Jumanji - 1995

 I rather liked it, it was bizarre but funny and warm.

In 1869 two kids bury a box and in 1969 Alan Parrish finds it, with a board game inside that he takes home. He’s a rich kid wiht problems, almost ready to run away from home because he thinks his father doesn’t like him or understand him, but then a friend visits who can hear the druns beating, so they play Jumanji instead, together. 
“Jumanji is a game for those who seek to find, a way to leave their world behind”. 
She feels too old to play a board game (:/) but the token moves by itself. 
“At night they fly, you better run, these winged things are not much fun” and then his token moves and he’s like “Oh no the game thinks I rolled” - “what do you mean, the game thinks?” To him, the game says:
“In the jungle you must wait, until the dice read five or eight”, and he’s sucked into the game, yelling for her to roll the dice, but bats fill the room, Sarah screams and runs away scared.
26 years later, the house is for sale, bought by Nora, a woman who must take care of Peter and Judy, her brother’s kids, because he died with his wife. Alan is believed to be dead. 
Peter never talks to anyone but Judy, and she always lies. 
Now she hears the drums but Nora doesn’t. The kids find the game, but two tokens are stuck. Judy battles the huge mosquitos away, but the monkeys destroying the kitchen stay there.
Also written on the game: “adventurers beware: do not begin unless you intend to finish. The exciting consequences of the game will vanish only when a player has reached Jumaji and called out its name”.
Peter rolls a 5 and a beautiful lion scares them, but a strange man appears to help: long hair and beard, clothed with… leather and leaves? Alan’s room is still  as it was, left untched (who knows why, I see no reason for Nora not to use it… maybe it’s simply that she didn’t have time to think about it yet, she probably would have later). Alan is very happy to be back home, but he has no idea how much time has passed, and he calls for mom and dad… When he’s told that it’s 1995 he runs to find his parents, but his father’s factory is in ruins. Both parents died in 1991, his father loved him and spent everything to find him. 
The bugs that came out of Jumanji keep hurting people, and the monkeys create a lot of trouble. To finish the game, they also need Sarah because there are four tokens on the board. Sarah is terrified of the game and has had lots of therapy to convince herself it wasn’t real. 
For Sarah there’s vicious vines, for Alan a hunter with a rifle. For Judy it’s a huge stampede of various animals, and a bird steals the game. 
Peter tries to cheat to end the game and is now quite hairy and with a tail. 
The hunter has a new, modern weapon and shoots at Sarah too, obsessed with shooting Alan. The vines took over the house, and not just that. Sarah’s turn, it’s a monsoon in the house, togeether with a huge crocodile. For Alan, the floor becomes quicksand. Judy goes back a turn stopping it but Alan’s stuck in the  floor. 
Peter’s turn: lots of giant spiders. Judy is stung by a flower (not sure where it came from, the vicious one from the vines was huge, this one wasn’t, is it the same?). Luckily the spiders go away because the whole house is separated in the middle. That was Sarah, so now it’s Alan’s turn. The hunter tries to shoot him and Sarah runs in front of him, but Alan won the game so everything vanishes, and Alan and Sarah are back in 1969, in their young kids bodies, and Alan hugs his father. They throw the game in the water…
Years later, Alan and Sarah are married, and waiting for Judy and Peter to attend their party with their parents. Both Alan and Sarah yell NO when they talk of a trip to Canada, so they won’t go, won’t die, and they’ll keep living with their kids.

Kirsten Dunst as Judy  — I didn’t know she was in this movie, but she has the same face, I recognized her immediately :)
Robin Williams as Alan Parrish
Bonnie Hunt as Sarah
Bradley Pierce as Peter

sabato 5 luglio 2025

Shadowhunters: The mortal instruments season 3


For future reference, Asmodeus is pronounced Asmòdius.

My favourite  of the whole season is of course Magnus Bane. Alec… yes and no. They have lovely and touching scenes together, but Alec in this season makes me often angry. He so easily believes Magnus when he says he’s fine, he doesn’t understand when he’s suffering, and he doesn’t understand what it is for him to be without magic, I don’t think he even really tries, since he probably likes the idea of Magnus being as mortal as he is, and also maybe being the strongest of the two for once. If he really wanted, it would’t be too difficult to connect and try to understand what Magnus feels without magic, because he was born with magic, that’s the life he’s always known, so what would Alec feel if someone stripped him of his runes and forbid him to work at the institute? It’s a poor comparison, and yet I doubt he would be like: okay, there’s other things I could be doing, and if there’s danger my boyfriend will protect me. No, he wouldn’t accept it, he’d want to help, to know.
AND, Alec knows that not only Magnus did it for him, but also that to Alec it was worth it to help Jace…

I really like this last season’s Maryse, she’s basically another person, another character. 


1

Clary is officially a shadowhunter now, got her rune ceremony and her angel rune, but they all think she ‘prevented a wish from being granted’. Jace says nobody can ever know, so she keeps lying. She gets to choose her signature weapon, and she chooses two blades, one was her father’s, the other her mother’s.


Magnus is no more the high warlock of Brooklyn. He tells Alec it’s nothing, but Catarina says he was beyond himself because of it.

Alec is offered a good position in Idris, but he should move there and Magnus couldn’t visit. When Alec confronts him on his truth, Magnus also admits he doesn’t want him to go away, so he won’t. Well, it seems to me like Alec believed him too easily when he said he was okay, of course he wasn’t. 


A kind nurse is attacked, maybe possessed by a demon or something, and he kills his wife.

Clary will kill him with the sun rune. The demon is set on finding more virtuous to ‘corrupt’.


Simon entertains the queen with songs, then she brands his forehead and lets him go. 

2

Magnus and Alec go to a warlock party for the new high warlock of Brooklyn, Lorenzo Rey. He appears to be a jerk, then something happens, everything shaking, and people losing control of their magic, and to me it looked like Magnus saved the day, but later he says his magic was useless like everyone else’s, and Lorenzo accuses him of sabotaging his party, and it turns out Magnus’ father is Asmodeus, very big demon. Magnus thinks someone much worse is actually responsible. Asmodeus is like the prince of  Hell or something (it’s not clear to me : Edom is just one plane of demons, it’s not Hell, right? Otherwise it couldn’t end the way it did… ?)

Anyway, when Lorenzo accuses Magnus because that level of magic is like Asmodeus’ or something, Alec suggests he goes and investigate this magic:so Alec distracts Lorenzo giving Magnus the chance to enter his home and study the ley lines, discovering that it was not his father but a worse, greater demon… 

Magnus will then cure the ley lines from the institute (and having a hard time during it, poor thing, but he does it).


Jace asks Simon a name of a nice restaurant without explanation, to have a dinner date with Clary, and they find themselves having to share a table… with Simon and Maia for one of the worst date ever, because first Simon knows her much better than he does, then Jace lets it out that he and Maia hooked up once… they are pretty ok with the date anyway.

Jace keeps dreaming of killing Clary of seeing Jonathan telling him to kill her.


The demon woman ‘corrupts’ more virtuous so she can then use their blood. 


When the usual bad werewolves attack Simon because they don’t want him around, because he’s a vampire, his forehead glows and his powers are woah! The rune activates to protect him, hurting the werewolf.

3

Jace keeps seeing Jonaathan and is voncinced that the demon with an owl face (it doesn’t really look like an owl to me but that’s what they call it…) is Jonathan.


Simon wants to know what the rune on his forehead means. He tries to reenter the Seelie world to find out, but can’t. 


Raphael’s little sister Rosa, now an old woman, dies.


Magnus hosts a family dinner for Alec’s mom, it should have been all of them but Izzy goes out with Clary and Jace worried about the Jonathan situation. Needless to say, Maggnus is a great host. Maryse is all smiles and sweetness, and after dinner she tells Alec that the Clave has reclassified her a traitor and will strip her of her runes (or has already done it?… not sure)

Maryse hugs Magnus and tells him “thank you for loving my boy”, it’s a warm hug :)


We see that the owl is Jace.

4

Jonathan is not yet back to life, his mom wants 33 deathsto bring him back and uses Jace to get them (this is how it goes:the owl finds a good person and attacks them, they become possessed by the demon and they kill the person nearest to them, a loved one, that’s the death. Then these possessed people willingly shed their blood for the demon woman).


Heidi escapes. Raphael was keeping her prisoner. She kills a man and he’s now a vampire - not for long though - Clary kills him. Heidi chains Raphael and leaves him on the roof to die in the sun; his leg starts to burn but Izzy and Clary save him. He says he doesn’t know who the rogue vampire is but Isabelle knows him and finds out: it was his own experiment to become a daylighter. He sort of tortured Heidi ? He kept her chained, experimented on her? 

Izzy tells him to leave the city or she’ll report him. 


Simon left the werewolf to avoid any more ‘accidents’ and now he finds a new roommate, but he works for the Praetor. 


The owl frees Morgan of her demonic possession. I guess it’s because she was in a cell and Magnus could have found out something from her…

Jace remembers nothing and is losing his mind. The owl got 23 already.


5

Jace helps Simon and they find out Kyle is a Praetor Lupus, “it’s a secret organization of wolves”, guardians. Simon leaves.


The demon mom goes to Magnus, she wants something to make someone fall out of love, and he gives it to her (because she words it like a good deed) but she needs a piece of Clary’s soul. 

Clary wants to summon the angel Ithuriel herself, to help Jace. Of course when she wants to do something, she does it. Ithuriel tells her that it’s not her fault but Jace is now vulnerable to the great demon, the owl has a master… but the angel gets killed before saying the name. Killed by the demon that she sent, who then touched Clary to take a piece of her soul. 

Jace wants to go to the Silent City for help, but the demon woman puts the potion in his beer. 


izzy goes out with the mundane doctor, Charlie.


Alec  asks Magnus if he can move in, but Magnus says it’s too soon. Alec saw him looking into a box, and when he’s alone, he takes it out and looks inside, and sees the picture of a soldier named George. He thinks everything in that box belongs to George, that maybe Magnus still loves him, but the truth is something else. After Alec apologises, Magnus says that that box is where he keeps his mementos, one for each people he had a relationship with, and outlived. Now Alec is upset for a different reason, because one day he will die and have a place in that box.


Clary tells Luke of the wish, of what she did, that Jace died.


6

Heidi goes to her sire, Simon, totally shocking him. He didn’t know she was ‘alive’. She attacks Isabelle but Simon intervenes before Isabelle can kill her. Then he gives her to the Praetor group.


The greater demon already got 32 deaths, she needs the last one. The owl attacks Ollie, Luke shoots him and Clary sees that it’s Jace.


Maryse bears her heart to Isabelle.


7

Jace throws Clary off a roof, and she calls Simon for help because she can’t move. Alec, Isabelle and Clary get Imogen’ help to get a cage to trapp Jace; they get it, but not before Jace kills Imogen. They trap him but Clary stays behind to let them escape when people arrive.


Jordan Kyle is Maia’s sire. She hates him because they were in love once: when he was turned, he changed, they broke up, he got jealous and attacked her in wolf form, but then he ran away and never helped her. 


The demon is Lilith, Queen of Edom. Adam’s first wife, the mother of all demons. 


Ollie killed her mother, now it’s 33 deaths, and it helps Lilith bring back Jonathan.


8

Magnus helps Alec and Isabelle go into Jace’s mind to bring him back. They find him and he begs them to kill him because Lilith will make him do more horrible things, and they promise to protect him against Lilith, but she comes and takes him away. Magnus can’t stop her, Lilith doesn’t kill him only because she doesn’t want a war with Asmodeus.

This was probably the best acting from ‘Jace’ so far in the show.


Clary reveals everything under the power of the Soul Sword during her trial, and she’s sentenced to death.


Maia goes away to sort out her feelings.


9

Jace stopped the praetor and took Heidi to Lilith. 


Luke loses his pack because he wants to save Clary.


When they’re about to kill Clary, she tells Jia that she can bring Valentine back to life (what luck that she was just informed of Jia’s interest…). And she does, she brings him back to life to question him. Valentine tells her that Lilith wants to get Jonathan back. Then Valentine takes Jia hostage, Clary helps her, she tries to stop him but he’s too strong. He kills a lot and frees his Circle. Clary stops Valentine again, then Jace takes his flesh and Clary to bring to Lilith.


Magnus has a way to stop Lilith, but he needs more power and Alec asks Lorenzo’s permission. Instead, Lorenzo forbids all his warlocks from helping him. Quite pissed, Magnus confronts Lorenzo and fights him. Just a bit, but it’s a really bad thing to attack your High Warlock.

Magnus is desperate to help Alec, because Jace is his parabatai, Alec loves him, and he also feels guilty for the promise he made and couldn’t keep, so Magnus thinks of asking his father’s help.


Heidi hurts Simon’s sister Becky when he’s starving so he feeds on her. Kyle went to Isabelle so they stop him, but his mom sends him away calling him a monster… well, come on, she just saw him almost killing her daughter…


10

Magnus goes to Edom to find Asmodeus. It’s not a sweet reunion, Magnus resents him because Asmodeus took him under his wing when he was a child and had nobody else - which may seem like a good thing, but Asmodeus I think taught him bad stuff, he’s a demon after all, so now Magnus doesn’t want to be close. So, of course Magnus refuses to stay there with him and rule over Edom together. Still, he asks for help. 


When Simon’s big sister Becky wakes up, she doesn’t hate him and doesn’t want to forget, she wants to be  by his side. He makes his mother forget and believe that he’s dead.


To save Clary, Alec fights Jace while Luke and Isabelle fight Lilith’s disciples. Jace is winning, and the demon is all cruel, telling us that inside there is poor Jace crying for what he’s about to do. It’s a nice thing that Alec hold off long enough to tell him that it’s not his fault and that he forgives him. Luckily, Magnus arrives just in time to save Alec’s life. And to free Jace, actually. He hits Jace with a powerful bolt of magic that breaks the demon possession for good, but when Jace asks him to immediately cure Alec, he can’t do it because he doesn’t have his magic anymore, he gave it up to free Jace. That was the deal.

Simon frees Clary, then she tells him to destroy Jonathan’s body, so Lilith attacks him and she’s defeated - banished to Edom then, not killed. It’s a powerful blast, and Clary was behind Lilith and is not here anymore, so Simon thinks he killed her.


When Magnus tells Jace that he gave up his magic to break Lilith’s hold on him, Jace doesn’t even bat an eye, he simply takes his stele to help Alec as he can and then he runs for Clary. And Alec too! After what he heard, he caers more about telling Jace that “it wasn’t you”. Even later, I don’t think Alec ever acknowledges how big a sacrifice it was. Magnus was born with magic! What’s more, Alec never acknowledges that he let Magnus go to Edom because it was all worth it to save Jace…

Alec sometimes acts jealous of Magnus’ past, but at least that was way in the past, while Jace is here, in Alec’s present…


11

Jace fights in a suicidal way thinking that Clary’s dead. Maia comes back for Simon. Jonathan is alive and so is Clary, of course; he has another face - which I guess is his own and not the one stolen from the real Sebastian? Who was that Sebastian anyway? Was he really called Sebastian?


Iris comes to get Madzie, but when she fails she gets Magnus. In my opinion he showed great strength and character: she wanted to get Madzie’s location from his mind, but he’s got centuries of memories in there, and he had her move around his thoughts showing her lots of different memories to keep her away from what she wanted. He may have been the bravest, cleverest, most admiring thing he’s ever done. But he still needed to be rescued and cured, and because of that he feels weak and humiliated.


Jonathan and Clary are linked by a rune, if one dies the other dies too.


12

Now that he’s mortal, Magnus and Alec train together which may be a very good or very bed idea, lol, since Magnus keeps flirting and the training stops rather quickly…


Luke and Jace work together to find out if Clary’s alive, because Luke is convinced that she’s not. Good dad. Jace, Luke and Alec find them but can’t kill Jonathan and have to let him go.


Simon and Isabelle go down the sewers to find the oldest vampire who maybe can remove the Mark of Cain, the rune on his forehead, and they find Cain himself. He’s lonely and scared, it was all Lilith’s fault, she changed him and made him kill his brother Abel. (… still, that was a long time ago, and he’s still stuck on that… of course it’s a trauma that stays, but what has he done with his life ever since?)

Cain says that only the Seelie Queen can remove that mark. So Simon goes there with Cain’s stone to perform the required ceremony, at risk of death. It hurts a lot but he makes it, and then Isabelle has him feed on her because he might die, evecn though it will renew her addiction.


13

The Praetor wolves hunt for Heidi. (Why is it that when a werewolf dies the ritual is to say Beati Bellicosi? What does it mean? That you die a fighter and therefore you’ll go to Paradise? But they say it for all werewolves, not just the good ones… )

Luke encourages Maia to become the new Alpha, and to put the pack first she breaks up with Simon.

Luke and Maryse kiss. Heidi makes a war break out between the vampires and the werewolves.


14

Magnus begs Lorenzo to help him, he wants to have magic again. Lorenzo can’t give him ‘his’ magic, meaning Magnus’, but he can give him a transfuzion of his own, it’s a thing apparently, and to be fair Lorenzo does warn him that there is no guarantee that all will be well… but Magnus insists, says he can take care of himself. So Lorenzo, as High Warlock, gives him some magic.

As his prize, he asks for Magnus’ apartment. Magnus of course agreed - and not only because the transfusion had already occured when Lorenzo made his demand, but most importantly because he would have given almost anything to have magic again, probably anything other than Alec or staying with his father. Alec is angry at Lorenzo when he learns this, and he really doesn’t understand why Magnus isn’t, why he says he’d do it again. Alec never had magic, and he really can’t understand what it means for Magnus. 


Jonathan takes Jace’s appearance and takes Clary around. She only understands the truth when he kisses her… because this Jonathan calls her sister, but he doesn’t act very brotherly…

What Jonathan wants is the Morning Star swork, that only a Morgenstern can wield. It can be used to summon demons from Hell.


Jordan is badly hurt after the vampires attack because he protected Maia,  and almost dies but Simon arrives barely on time. 


Clary is back with her people but she fails to stop Jonathan. 


15

Luke is arrested for the deaths of his pack. 

Isabelle goes to arrest Raphael, who now lives in a shelter helping poor people.

Heidi gives Alec the names of the vampires who attacked the wolves.

Maia finds Heidi and kills her, the sneaky Alpha injected herself with holy water so when Heidi bites her she dies.

(Two questions: do all hospitals keep holy water around? Where did she get it, since it didn’t take very long before she confronted Heidi? Just the time for Magnus to get there and help the woman in a coma and then they went looking for Heidi…

Also, did nobody notice while they were shooting that Maia had different shoes? At the hospital she had high-heel boots, but when she confronted Heidi she had no heels… I mean, they made close shots of her feet, that’s why I noticed, how come they didn’t?)


Magnus was living at the institute with Alec while looking for another apartment, and so he talked to Underhill and found out that Alec talked to him when they were having problems… and he’s jealous, especially because when he says ‘your handsome friend’ Alec immediately guesses it’s Underhill :)

At the end, Magnus and Alec agree to move in together when he finds a new apartment, then Magnus starts bleeding and collapses.


16

Alec is terrified for Magnus, Catarina helps: Magnus’ body is rejecting Lorenzo’s magic, and using it again could put him at risk, so Alec asks Lorenzo to help him, to save him by taking his magic back.

At first Magnus refuses, but Alec explains that he loves him for who he is, not for his magic, and tells him that he can’t lose him, so Magnus accepts and loses his magic again.

After being so terrified to lose him, Alec goes to Maryse to ask her for the family ring, he wants to give it to Magnus, wants to ask him to marry him.

(I know it wall all Magnus imagination but I so didn’t like that ‘dance scene’… :/ )


Jonathan wants to kill Lilith and bring her head to the Seelie Queen in exchange for the sword, but before he can do it, Clary summons her elsewhere, to find out how to erase that rune that bonds her with Jonathan. Cain frees Lilith believing her word that she’ll bring Abel back (is he a naive kid or what? He should be old enough not to believe this stuff anymore, come on…)

Clary watches Jonathan hurt her friends until finally Simon bites him, and then she banishes him into a cell. Poor Simon had to spit black stuff.


17

Isabelllew wants Simon to go into the Clave prison to find out what happens there, if they really torture people or not, and to look for a mythological sword called the Glorious. 

This Victor of the Clave has a piece of the Glorious, and he’s using it to make a serum that once injected can make them all human again. (Well, humans that were turned into vampires or wolves go back to being human again, but the Seelies and the warlocks too for that matter were born the way they are, so they would just bes tripped of their powers and become mortals?)

Raphael is glad for it, Iris is not, but Victor plans to spread it to everyone, that they want it or not. I think Iris gets killed. 

How long has this serum being perfected? How many downworlders have been turned into humans? What happened to them, since not one of them gave ever any news about themselves? They were all kept there at the Clave prison? Maybe, it’s where Simon finds Raphael, and there are a few people, although not all that many…


Magnus finds a grey hair, he’s without magic and feels useless, so he starts drinking. He always loved to drink, but maybe because he’s mortal now, his body can’t take it as well as before. 

It was supposed to be Alec’s great night, he wanted everything to be perfect, he put together a romantic dinner for two, there were flowers, but Magnus shows up late and drunk. He says that he’s not happy, that what he’s feeling might never end, and that he’s now a mortal like Alec always wanted… and then he cries in Alec’s arms.


18

Becky comes to celebrate Halloween with Simon like always. She’s nice, I like her. She makes Simon smile with her cape and enthusiasm, and he brings her to Maia’s bar where she can watch lots of downworlders without their glamours. Did they already say that every warlock is born with an animal feature, but they hide it with glamours? I don’t remember it, but Magnus surely got lucky to have fascinating cat eyes instead of a pig’s nose…


The Praetor Lupus free Luke from prison, all legal, he’s free now.


The Seelie Queen now wants Jonathan dead, but Clary knocks out Jace and goes to save her big brother. 


When Magnus was drunk he explained how miserable he is without his magic, and that he’ll never be happy now (well, not exactly but this is how Alec perceived it) so Alec speaks with Asmodeus, asks him to help Magnus, and Asmodeus will do it only if he breaks Magnus’ heart. Alec thinks about it, and he believes it’s the only thing that will make Magnus happy, because Alec knows he’s not his first love and says that he won’t be the last either, he’s sure Magnus will recover and be happy, so he does it. He goes to Magnus and breaks up wiht him. He tells him that the spark he fell in love with is gone.


19

Asmodeus finds a way to enter this wordl and goes to Magnus and gives him his magic back. He wants him at his side, but Magnus refuses. He has his magic back now, but he’s not happy because he’s heartbroken. He keeps walking around aimlessly for hours, and then he asks Brother Zacharias to erase his memories of Alec, but Brother Zacharias refuses and does so by speaking out loud, to make clear how important this is, because he thinks it’s a mistake and thinks that Magnus knows it as well, because Magnus has the power to do it himself if he wants to. 

It was really bad to see that Magnus was actually going to do it, his weakest and worst moment, although I understand he was hurting a lot… still, that was bad… I hated that scene because of this. Good thinkg Asmodeus stopped him, for his own reason for sure, but at least he stopped him. (Maybe he did watch The  Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind, and knew it mit start all over again and he doesn’t want that, he wants Magnus to get evr him and become hard-hearted because of it)

Now Magnus cries in his father’s arms. 


Clary is with Jonathan now, she still loves Jace though. Jace goes with Clary and Jonathan, she wants them both with her. Thy’re to kidnap the Seelie Queen to get the sword from her. 


Maia is upset that they destroyed all the serum, taking away their choice to go back to a normal life. And what was left, they’re using it all to help Clary, of course. 

Isabelle forges the Glorious, it wasn’t all that impossible after all…


20

Amodeus gets Magnus his apartment back, because Lorenzo’s father is a subject of his, which he says makes Lorenzo a subject of Magnus, or stuff like that, and Magnus doesn’t stop him when he turns Lorenzo into a lizard, nor does he turn him back or ask his father to do it. 

But Maryse won’t let it go, she wants to know why Alec did what he did, and, smart woman that she is,  she understands as soon as she sees that Magnus has magic again. Now she understands why Alec said that he had to break up with Magnus because it was the only way he’d ever be whole again, and she makes Magnus understands. Well, she can’t tell him because she doesn’t really know the details, she doesn’t know that Asmodeus is here, but she knows that the two things are related and so she makes him think of when exactly did his magic return. 

Magnus exchanges words with his father, but he acts calm, so Asmodeus won’t go into defence mode. And then Magnus banishes him into Limbo forever.

They did say, maybe back in the first series, that if you enter a portal unconscious you get lost in limbo forever (no matter where that portal was to, I guess), so I wonder why didn’t they ever try this… 


Jordan tells Maia he stole the last serum for her, and also that he’s not cured, he’s still poisoned. Maia gives the serum to Luke who got it under the Praetor’s orders. Jordan dies. 


Clary and Jonathan exchange the Seelie Queen for the sword, and the three Lightwoods are there too (yeah, technically Jace isn’t, but he is, so there.) The boys trap Jonathan, waiting for Isabelle to free Clary. Simon arrives just in time to stop her from killing Isabelle, and Jace uses the sword to break the bond. Now Alec should kill Jonathan, but he fails because without the bond to Clary he has huge black wings, he’s what, a full demon now?

The Glorious breaks, huting Izzy that protected Simon because it could have killed him, being a vampire. 

Jonathan still has the sword and he’s calling demons now. Jia’s daugher Aline and Helen are together now. Helen is the half Seelie that helped Simon destroy the serum.


Magnus arrives to help in the battle against the demons, it’s really bad. Magnus and Alec talk, and this is my favourite Alec scene, he really looks moved by it all, really emotional when Magnus tells him that he knows of the deal, and then Magnus asks him to marry him and they put the rings on… But since a rift has been opened and demons keep coming and destroying Alicante (they’re in Alicante, right? Where warlocks are not allowed? Could Magnus come here only because the demons were destroying the towers keeping downworlders out?) Magnus will go to Edom to strengthen his magic and close it from there. It’s really hard to separate now that they got each other’s back, but now they now that they’re still iin love, and love gives strength. 

Clary and Jace said that Jonathan destroyed the sword, but to me it looked like he merely banished it, it didn’t break, it just disappeared is what I mean… anyway, the point is that without the sword they can’t close the rift, so Magnus does, he goes to Edom - without any Pentagram this time, he just fires up his magic and ascends as if to Heaven only he goes to Edom. Anyway, Alec cries but slowly the rift closes, they can clearly see the demons disappearing and none more arriving, and then the sky is clear again. Magnus did it.


Magnus’ expression when he talked to Maryse and realized the truth about why Alec left him, that’s what acting is about, I love that scene. For both of them. Also the scene when they propose to each other, it’s beautiful and well acted (or it wouldn’t be beautiful, would it now?). I love it.

Only thing is, where did the “only i you’ll marry me too” line come from? It makes no sense. Is it just a way for them to ‘both’ propose? Or a way to state that you’re not just accepting it like a girl? It’s nonsense and not nice at all from whatever angle I look at it. It almost ruined the scene, and it tarnishes it a little bit because it really irritates me to hear it. 

 

21

Magnus is not back, he can’t come back or the rift will reopen, so he has to stay in Edom to keep them all safe. He saved Alicante, but Maryse thinks that if he came back, the whole of Edom would come here as well. 

Alec doesn’t give up. 

In Edom, Lilith wants to raise an army against Magnus, because now he’s stronger than her - and this… how come he’s stronger? He’s got his power back, and that’s it, he didn’t take his father’s magic, so his Asmodeus by himself was not stronger than her, the Queen of Edom, how come he is? Sure, they say something about having been weakened by Simon’s rune, the Mark of Cain, but this much???


Simon goes to kiss Isabelle, but she has heavenly fire in her now, and to come into contact with anyone from the downworld could kill both her and the other. 


They find a way to go to Edom but you should have downworlder blood to do it, so Isabelle goes by herself because ‘s got heavenly fire to protect her - she’s knows about it like five minutes and she already masters it, and uses it like magic… and what, giving Simon a hug could kill them, but going to the demon world won’t?

Alec wants Simon to bit him so he’ll be able to go as well, but of course they find another way. Alec saves Lorenzo, apparently Asmodeus wasn’t needed to turn him back into a human, I think Alec called Catarina after the lizard wrote help on the glass of its little cage. Clary invents a rune to connect them, so that shadowhunters can get into Edom. She has speed like Simon, Alec has magic like Lorenza, and Jace is connected to Meliorn…

The Seelie guard is the one that warned them about Isabelle going to Edom, that’s why he’s with them now.  So now Jace can’t lie and he says out loud that he’s terrified. 

Alec, Lorenzo, Clary and Simon reach Magnus, but Jace and Isabelle find Lilith’s place instead.


The Praetor has Luke use the serum on himself. He goes back to being a Shadowhunter, not a simple human, but what he was before he was turned into a wolf. He has all his runes and can use them. The Praetor wants him to check on the Clave for him. 


I don’t know, it seems like Jonathan is sick somehow, maybe transforming into something, and the Seelie Queen wants to help him… I don’t know why, I don’t really understand it, does the Queen hate the Shadowhunter? So much so that she’s thrilled to help Jonathan against them? And what’s going on with Jonathan? Wasn’t he already stronger when he got wings and escaped Alec?It’s not really clear to me, he’ll just come back with fair hair being the only difference…

Jonathan now looks like Spike, and the Seelie Queen gives him Shadowhunters to kill, as a gift…


22

Lilith injures Meliorn, then all the others reach him. They all fight together, then Izzy uses heavenly fire… and she starts burning, so they all bond to her to save her…

(One question, the rune Clary puts on them links them all to each other? I thought they were linked in pairs, otherwise why didn’ Jace get vampire speed or magic, but only Meliorn’s Seelie powers? Is it just stand in a circle and hold hands that makes them all linked???)

 

Clary can do anything with runes, she thinks she’s unstoppable and without limits… how did they survive without her before?…

Izzy and her heavenly fire destroyed Lilith, “but the chain reaction is destroying the entire realm”, so they escape, and Magnus brings them all back. No need to stay and keep the rift close since there will be no more Edom… - still, wouldn’t their escape free all the demons there? Or will they stay behind and die to the last one? Why? 


All the three couples make up for lost time, and then Magnus watches Alec sleeping… *heart*

Magnus has never been married before (which, I guess, he sort of already told us in season 1 when he muttered about knowing nothing about marriage…), and Alec is all emotional about that, maybe he finally feels special for Magnus. 

After all they went through Magnus doesn’t want to wait a single day more so he’s planning their wedding for “tonight”, at the Institute after Alec convinced him. 


The Seelie Queen wants Jonathan at her side as her king, to destroy the Shadowhunters and rule the world together, instead he kills her … she’s dead, isn’t she? Can the Seelie Queen be killed?

Clary asks Izzy to become her parabatai. The Angel Raziel doesn’t like it when she invents rune after rune to do as she pleases, especially runes like the necromancy rune she used on Valentine, and she has an ultimatum now. Stop it or she’ll lose her gift. 

Jonathan goes around killing people and Shadowhunters, destroying every Institute around the world  - but he left Alec’s father and Max alive, so that the audience does not really perceive the great loss, it’s still a happy ending as long as our people are alive…

So Clary goes alone to Toronto where Jonathan is now, and she uses one last rune to stop him forever, using it on contact while she’s hugging him - and crying, but is she really crying for him at all, even a little bit? Or is she crying because she’ll lose her gift and be forced to abandon the Shadow World?

Right away, one of her runes disappears from her skin. 


They all go to the wedding - not Luke, he’s busy, but Lorenzo is there after he had an open-hearted chat with Magnus and got an invitation from him. 

Alec asked Jace again so he’s there as his best man, whatever they call it. Maryse is there with the dress that Magnus sent for her: wonderful taste, she looks great, and like a queen.

The wedding is brief but lovely; Madzie walks first spreading flowers, Jace and Catarina have their seats up there next to them, then Alec arrives with his father and Magnus with Maryse on his arm. Magnus and Alec give their promise, one line each, and then they say together “I am and will always be your loving husband”, and after this Brother Zacharias who hasn’t yet spoken a word, speaks: “It is my honour to pronounce you one”, and everyone claps and smiles. When they dance, alone, Alec says “I’m not stepping on your feet, am I?” And Magnus “how could you be? It’s like I’m walking on air”, and it’s a slow slow dance. 

They’re at the institute so it’s probably normal that Underhill is there. There is also Raphael, who entered a seminar, his true vocation apparently. Aline and Helen want to marry, there’s a cute spark between Lorenzo and Underhill, Max calls Magnus ‘brother’…


The wedding was so brief because this show is all about Clary so we see her most of all.

Clary wears a dress that shows a lot of bare skin, all her arms and shoulders and back, and yet nobody notices that her runes are disappearing one after the other. 

The nicest thing about her is that she took Simon apart for an emotional talk, to properly say goodbye to him, since he was always her best friend. 

Jace and Clary declare their undying feelings for each other… and then she walks away and cries. 

She goes out just before the last one, and she forgets everything. She left Jace a letter to explain what happened.



Actually, this is really weird, because the voice over explains why she left: “by the time you read this letter, my memories of you and the Shadow World will be gone. It was the price the Angels made me pay for the runes I’ve created. But I have no regrets. Even if I don’t remember you, you will always be in my heart”.


But the scene shows us Jace reading the letter, and we get a glimpse of it, butit’s enough for us to see what it is, and it’s something completely different, both in words and in meaning.

“Dear Jace, forgive me for leaving all of a sudden, I came to the realization that its time for me to move on. I dont know what is motivating me to take this action but I must act on my feelings”

Then it says that they had a connection from the start, and it goes on “You and I spent many years together and have experienced many adventures together which I will never forget” and at the bottom: “may our shadows meet again, love Clary”


The letter means that she remembers everything, and will keep remembering, and that nobody is forcing her to leave but she’s doing it anyway for her own reasons, it’s basically the exact opposite of what is going on.

I don’t understand why they had this letter in the show, did they write it on purpose for whatever reason? Or was it for some future scene that they never got to shoot because the show ended? I don’ think there would be any need to prepare a letter that much in advance, if it’s true that they knew from the end of season 2 that season 3 would be the last one. 

I don’t know why, but I don’t like it because it sort of ruins the moment, and sort of makes you wonder if he’s really reading the words we’re hearing or he’s actually reading the letter that we see…




We move to one year later (and it’s clear that they know that Clary doesn’t remember them and are trying to keep their distance and move on).

Alec is an Inquisitor, Luke and Maryse are stll together and happy, Izzy is head of the Institute, Maia owns the restaurant and wants it to welcome everyone, not just werewolves, and is devising a menu to attract all sorts. 

The Shadow World is more united and peaceful under Alec’s guide. There’s “deputized downworlders working hand in hand with Shadowhunters”, as Luke says. 

Magnus is the High Warlock of Alicante! And full of work because “everyone’s been recalibrating their wards lately to allow for Downworlders”.

Magnus and Alec have a drink (that Alec poured) and say “to us”, which sort of is how it all started :-)


Simon trains with Jace, but Jace can’t forget Clary, of course, so he stalks her from time to time, without hiding since she can’t see any of them anymore.

She went to the Academy of Arts, and at a gallery she sees Jace watching her. She shouldn’t be able to, but she sees him, and even remembers his name…


What happened to Cain? Is he alive anywhere or did Lilith kill him? And Abel? Still dead, I suppose. And Edom? I mean, it got completely destroyed as in, it doesn’t exist anymore, so what about demons? There are other demonic planes full of demons or are there no more demons? And those in Edom, they all died?

I suppose that Lorenzo is still High Warlock of Brooklyn.

But how is the Seelie world? There is another queen or is she not dead after all? Seelie can die, can’t they?