sabato 18 agosto 2018

Cabin fever - 2003

I’m not very fond of horrors but as a thriller it was not too bad. A bit silly here and there and too loud at moments, but all in all not too bad. You know, only a little bad. I didn’t like the excessive amount of F word they all said, nor I liked or understood all the gay-jokes, if that’s what they were. Bert hunts squirrels because they’re gay, and when Paul wants to keep kissing Karen and questions why she’s swimming away she tells him ‘you’re so gay’, and I don’t understand, was that a code for something?  Anyway, not my usual cup of tea, but rather what one expects from this kind of movies. Still, future-me reading this, do not watch it again, you were not fond of all the blood-spitting that went on and on... 
The story starts, almost traditionally, with five kids on their way to a vacation in a rented cabin in the woods (what a great idea, always a winning one). They are Jeff and his girlfriend Marcy, Paul and his long-term friend Karen, and Bert the idiot.
They stop at the latest store before getting to the cabin, and there’s a weird kid who bites Paul’s hand. His father says that he shouldn’t sit next to Dennis! 
They arrive at the cabin. Jeff and Marcy have sex and Bert goes out looking for squirrels to shoot; instead he shoots a man already sick and tells nothing to the others. 
All around a bonfire to tell each other gruesome stories, they are approached by a strange guy with a scary dog who wants to join in: Jeff says that it’s a “private conversation”, he says that he has a lot of weed, and they welcome him eagerly. He says his name is Justin but to call him Grim, and when it starts raining he goes away.
The sick man comes to their door asking for help and they want to, but then he points a finger at Bert saying ‘he shot me’ and Bert quickly closes the door on his face shouting that he’s not letting that crazy sick man in. The man takes their car so they all rush out to stop him, with weapons of all sorts.
The man spits blood all over their car and when he gets out they scream for him to back off and then they set him on fire and he runs away. Not one of the kids seems to have noticed that he had said that Bert had shot him, that fact will never be addressed. 
We see that the dead body is in the river (quite reasonably since he was on fire) and that’s where their water comes from. 
There’s a bit of wandering about now, looking for help since they’re all upset and want to go home but their car doesn’t work now.
Paul and Karen stay at the cabin, Jeff and Bert find a woman’s place and learn that the animals are sick, she’s angry because she can’t eat the pigs she bought because they’re all sick. She offers to help them by calling a tow truck but they learn that the hermit man was actually her cousin Henry so they quickly run away. 
Marcy joins them at another house but there’s nobody in.
Meanwhile deputy sheriff Winston comes to ask Paul about the previous night commotion. He tries to explain and Winston, standing right next to the car completely covered in blood, both outside and inside, tells him to keep partying and not to worry and talks about girls. 
Karen drinks water and she’s the first to get sick. It’s some kind of flesh-eating disease and Paul finds out because when he wakes up beside her he starts touching her while she sleeps and realizes that her legs are all damaged and bloody. Her friends lock her in a shed outside because they don’t want to get whatever she has. Bert repairs the car; Paul and Marcy take Karen to the car but she starts spitting blood. Bert just found out he’s sick too (he also drank water). Jeff is scared and refuses to enter the car or be near Karen; he takes a lot of beer bottles from the fridge and goes away alone telling them all to stay away from him. Bert goes away alone in the car, and stops at the store, where Dennis bites his hand. Totally unprovoked this time, Bert only inquired about a hospital or a doctor saying that all his friends are sick, this time nobody sat next to him, and yet Dennis got up and went to bite his hand... his father gets angry now saying that if he’s sick he might have made his son sick.. so he calls two friends (the dumb-looking one says he’ll get 'the kit’) and with rifles they go after the kids at the cabin.
Paul finds the corpse in the river and falls in the water. Marcy is rotting too and when she gets out Grim’s dog gets her and kills her. When Paul sees that Karen is still alive but her face has been eaten away by the disease, he kills her smashing her head. 
The car stops in the woods, but Bert reaches the cabin to warn Paul. When the men get there and open the door, Bert works as bait in a chair in front of the door. A man shoots him and Paul kills him, who falling shoots Dennis father, who tries to go away but Paul goes after him and kills him with a stake. Paul also kills the third man with a screwdriver - he didn’t have time to open his ‘kit’.
Paul finds Grim dead too. He takes Dennis’ father’s car, tuns over an animal and shoots it because it got stuck in the windshield, getting blood all over his face. He finds a group of people having a party, with Winston among them. Looking all covered in blood like that he asks for help, a ride would be good, then he starts spitting blood all over them before hitting Winston and going away. He sort of faints on the road and a truck stops and takes him to a hospital. When he saw a man in a bunny-suit at the hospital I thought  for a moment that he was delirious and maybe it was all an hallucination, but no. 
The hospital can’t help, and Winston takes him away. 
Jeff comes back at the cabin, sees all the corpses and says ‘they’re all dead’, and then he screams “I made it” over and over, because he was the only one not contaminated, but as soon as he steps outside the sheriff and two deputies shoot him dead (very night-of-the-living-dead !)
The sheriff, his two men and Winston set fire to all the bodies. 
We see a couple of children taking water from the river, and there’s a corpse there but I wasn’t sure: was that still Henry’s body? What happened of Paul? Was he burned or killed some other way?
The sheriff and his men go to the store where the two children offer him lemonade they made with that water.
The first time the kids stopped at the store the owner said that the rifle was for the negros and they thought he meant to shoot them, but the last scene shows us three black kids going in and the man giving them back their rifle well polished. 
There’s a big party, and not only the sheriff and his men but everyone drinks that lemonade, plus there’s a big truck bringing away the Spring Water... which means much more people will get infected soon.
Paul-Rider Strong
Karen-Jordan Ladd
Jeff-Joey Kern
Marcy-Cerina Vincent
Bert-James DeBello


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