Shrek - 2001

 I remember when it came out, it was like a storm because it was a first, it was different and funny, and also very romantic, a real success; it was sarcastic and full of movie references, like when the princess suddenly acted like Trinity from Matrix. I loved it too.

I love the Italian version even more, to be honest, and it goes for all 4 movies of course, though I must say I like the female voices a lot.

Also, there could be lots of things to talk about here, I mean, two parents locked away her daughter where nobody could ever see her because… she did not look like a princess beauty??? We see in the film that her personality does not change, she does not become aggressive or anything dangerous, she simply looks like an ogre, and so she was locked away for years??? See the bad message here? See what this society does? Because that’s what it teaches us still, that we must be thin and pretty to be accepted into society.

It says a lot that nobody back then mentioned this little detail, it seemed normal. Also that she liked Shrek because a random male could be excused from looking like that, but not a girl and a princess too! Also, she liked him, loved him, and yet she didn’t think that he could break her curse because… why? Because he’s not a real knight? Not a prince?

This is what our superficial society is.

It starts like many other animated movies, like a fairytale with its book and its “once upon a time”: “there was a lovely princess but she had an enchantment opon her of a fearful sort, which could only be broken by love’s first kiss. She was locked away in a castle guarded by a terrible fire breathing dragon Many brave knights ha attempted to free her from this dreadful prison but none prevailed. She waited in the dragon’s keep, in the highest room of the tallest tower, for her true love and true love’s first kiss”… and at this point Shrek laughs at this, says “like that’s ever gonna happen” and flushes his toilet.

The film’s atmosphere is set :lol:

We see where he lives, his swamp and his house .He has a mud shower and paints a “beware ogre” sign to keep everyone away. People try to kill him with pitchforks, torches and stuff, but run away terrified.

There’s a reward for fairytale creatures, so Geppetto turns Pinocchio in, sad, who is taken away as a “possessed toy”; Peter Pan turns Trilli in, a man the three pigs, and a woman has a talking donkey.

Donkey escapes, hides behind Shrek and basically never leaves him.

Shrek doesn’t want him around, he likes his solitude, his “privacy”, but many others appear at his home: the three blind mices, the seven dwarves with the “dead broad” SnowWhite, the wold in gran’s night clothes, Pinocchio and every fairy tale creature that escaped from the “designated resettlement facility”. 

There’s witches, bears, fairies, a unicorn and there’s even a pied piper in red clothes playing for the rats.

Pinocchio says they’ve been “forced to come here”, to escape Lord Farquaad’s orders.

Shrek doesn’t want these “fairy tale things” to stay, so he walks to Duloc to talk to this Lord and get them to go away. Donkey goes too to show him the way.

This Lord is a short, red-wearing man who thinks he’s perfect and that “that fairy tale trash” is “poisoning” his “perfect world”.

He tortures the Gingerbread man by dunking him into milk to find out where they are hiding; his guards find the Magic Mirror - which is like interactive tv - and it suggests marrying a princess to become a king.

He has the choice of three bachelorettes: Cinderella is “a mentally abused shut-in from a kingdom far, far away”, and “her hobbies include cooking and cleaning for her two evil sisters”. SnowWhite is “a cape-wearing girl from theland of fancy;although she lives with seven other men, she’s not easy, just kiss her dead, frozen lips and find out what a live wire she is”. The third, Fiona, is “a fiery redhead from a dragon-guarded castle surrounded by hot boiling lava!”

He chooses Fiona, and a tournament will decide who will go and save Fiona for him.

(Well, had he chosen one of the other two, there would be no dragon to defeat…)

When Shrek appears and Lord Farquaad sets all knights on him, he easily defeats them - also with wrestling moves. Shrek is named champion and sent to free Fiona, in exchange for his swamp. 

It’s a long walk.

Donkey accidentally charms the she-dragon with his words. Shrek shakes Fiona to wake her up, and it’s all very different from what she was expecting. They can escape the dragon by putting a huge chandelier attached to a chain on her neck, lilke a collar and a leash.

Poor dragon, if Shrek had done things the proper way like Fiona wanted, she’d be dead now :-(

Fiona really thought things would go like a fairytale and is quite put out to see he’s an ogre, so he picks her up and onto his shoulder to carry her. She insists to stop for the night. Donkey and Shrek talk about how he wants to be alone because the world “seems to  have a problem” with him, because he’s an ogre and as soon as anyone sees him they yell and judge him before they even know him.

When Fiona sings with the birds, she goes so high-pitched that a bird explodes. She cooks the now three orphaned eggs and when Shrek belches, she does it too. It’s not how a princess is expected to be, so she says “you shouldn’t judge people before you get to know them” and when Robin Hood and his merry men try to “rescue her” from the ogre, she goes all martial arts on them, very Trinity from Matrix style, impressing Shrek a lot.

The rest of the walk goes better and they start liking each other, so when they see Duloc in the distance, she insists on camping for the night with an excuse. He cooks weedrats for her and she finds it delicious. Donkey finds out her secret, the curse she’s under since she was a little girl, every night her body changes and she becomes an ogre.

She’s upset because a princess is meant to look beautiful, she says “who could ever love a beast so hideous and ugly? Princess and ugly do’t go together, that’s why I can’t stay here with Shrek”

She still thinks, at this point, that she needs to marry this Lord Farquaad to break the curse: “my only chance to live happily ever after is to marry my true love”… does she even hear the words she says? *sigh* 

She even makes Donkey promise to keep her secret. Shrek hears her words and thinks she was speaking of him, so he goes and got Farquaad to come. She was ready to tell him the truth but the idiot goes “I heard every word and who could love a hideous, ugly beast?” So she believes he really heard every word and is now upset about her curse and could not like her like that.

Shrek’s a jerk with Donkey too, insults him and sends him away. 

The lonely dragon and the now lonely donkey meet again.

Good friend Donkey goes back to Shrek and they talk, and Donkey reveals Fiona was not talking about him, so tehy rush to see her before the wedding, flying on the dragon. Shrek misses the ‘speak now or forever hold your peace’ moment, there were already pronounced married; Shrek only comes before they can kiss. It is revealed that he’s in love so sh waits for sunset - seconds away - to show Shrek her secret. Farquaad goes crazy and the dragon eats him. 

Shrek kisses Fiona and she’s all surrounded by light, like the beast becoming back a prince, but of course here it’s the other way around, because if Shrek’s her true love, then love’s true form is that: she’s an ogre 24/7 now.

They get married and both creatures and people are there for them.

The ‘Shrek’ book ends with “and they lived ugly ever after”… 

The curse is “by night one way, by day another, this shall be the norm, until you find true love’s first kiss and then take love’s true form”

I think Fiona never stopped to consider the words ‘true love’ because she talks about it as if it was a marriage arranged against her will: “I can’t just marry whoever I want” … and why not? If he’s your true love, aren’t you supposed to love him?

They don’t have much consideration for animals here, because after the poor bird, they inflate a toad and a snake to carry around as balloons from the luna park. 

I don’t understand this fascination with Gingy, this “run run run as fast as you can, you can’t catch me I’m the gingerbread man” is like a nursery rhyme or is it part of some bigger story? I see Farquaad cut his legs, and at the en we see he got one leg reattached with sugar.

It also appears someone woke SnowWhite up because at the wedding she’s dancing - and failing to catch the bouquet, she-dragon gets it.

Duloc people appear very well behaved, because they follow the big signs very well: “revered silence” and no one speaks, “applause” and they all clap, and even “laugh” and they do.

At the wedding, Gingy dances with the little bride on the cake, the three pigs breakdance and Cinderella does the Macarena.

Also, I knew nothing of the old English nursery rhyme about the Muffin man, but the scene was done so well that somehow I loved the scene even though I could not catch the reference: “do you know the muffin  man? The muffin man? The muffin man! Yes, I know the muffin man, who lives on Drury Lane”.

A funny scene was when the mirror was being sassy so Lorrd F. calls Thelonius’ name, and this all-covered individual takes out a hand mirror and smashes it, as a warning to the Magic Mirror :lol:

Duloc was indeed a beautiful place, but Lord F.’s face on every souvenir to sell was really :-/

But, that information kiosk that welcomes them as they arrive is adorable, It’s a lovely idea, especially for the picture at the end, great souvenir :lol:

Lord F. is like every politician/powerful man in the world: “some of you may die, but it’s a sacrifice I am willing to make” and “it’s rude enough being alive when no one wants you…”

Finally, because it’s due a mention, the finale: “I’m supposed to be beautiful” - “but you are beautiful!”